WSJ readers in their most pitiful fashion shopping
WSJ readers in their most pitiful fashion shopping
Recently, we offered readers the chance to win this vintage Levi jacket embroidered to order and adorned with patches. All they had to do was tell us, in 100 words or less, about their most unfortunate fashion purchase. We received hundreds of tickets confessing all kinds of fashion mishaps. Some common themes: too small shoes that refused to stretch, "parachute trousers" uncomfortably irremediable, clothes that fell at inopportune moments and the particular misery involved in the use of the unflattering orange color. Here is the winning entry, a story that stood out for its ability to combine pathos with the word "go-go", in addition to the best finalists and honorable mentions.
The winning entry
"It was the 1960s and my pathetic life was not worth living without my own white Go-Go boots." As a fashion option, they were as practical and attractive as the miniskirts they were wearing. I had to have them. I spent my babysitting money on the cheapest pair available. It does not matter if the soles were made of cardboard and that we lived in Oregon. Where it rains The boots lasted three days. Then the soles deteriorated and the mold settled. I put them on until they smelled so bad that my mother made me throw them away. I still miss them. "
-Meryl Alcabes, Seattle, Wash.
Runners-up
"I bought a wide-brimmed hat, like the one that Audrey Hepburn used in a" Breakfast at Tiffany "scene, I thought it complemented my resemblance to the star, but I'm only 5 feet tall and the hat was dominant. In my office, my assistant told me that it looked like a mushroom. "
-Beatrice Gross, New York, N.Y.
"Crocs, I buy them, I use them, I'm ashamed, I give them, I miss them, I buy again, REPEAT."
-Lana Kaye, Framingham, mass.
"I was a third grade teacher and, in the 1980s, I bought a green cotton shirt dress. When I took him to school, I noticed that many staff members and students greeted me as they passed by. Later in the day, they said they thought I was wearing a Girl Scout uniform. I never used it again. "
-Marjorie Hauck, Amityville, N.Y.
Honorable mentions
"I once bought a helmet to use in the heat of the sun during a summer of baseball games. I became "that kid" since nobody wore anything remotely similar. And people wanted to hear my British accent. "
-Paul McGillivray, Rochester Hills, Mich.
"In high school, I wore fishnet stockings in almost every color of the rainbow. It gets better, I used tube socks over the nets with stripes the same color as the stockings. On really special days, I put a fake flower on my red hair that combined with the stockings and stripes. "
-Emily Schall, Boston, Massachusetts.
"A pair of black and white jeans. "One leg was black and the other white, it looked like an absolute idiot with two legs of different colors running in high school."
-Matthew Natahusada, Long Beach, California.
"Working with a group of lawyers for a few weeks in the 1980s, I noticed that they all wore suspenders, clean, I thought, but I was severely ridiculed for wearing both the belt and the suspenders. belt ".
-Robert Ballard, Jr., Chester, N.J.
"1976. Not one but two leisure suits, one with real rope for the pipe and the other with fake leather pipe, what was I thinking? Oh wait, I was 18. I was not! The leisure suits were ugly then and they would still be ugly today, I guess that's why I wear a real shirt and tie every day, trying to make up for the 1970s. "
-Kent Jones, Madisonville, Ky.
"I still shudder when I think about the year of high school when I was wearing bright orange bowling shoes every day, but I miss my happy ignorance of style, and now I spend a lot of time analyzing what a garment says about me instead. how it makes me feel. "
-Cal Gilmartin, Boston, Massachusetts.
"When I asked my wife Melanie E. Royce, a teacher, and a doctor of law, a beautiful lady always impeccably dressed, what was her biggest fashion mistake, I quickly got a one-word answer: 'You'. say why. "
-Stanton Royce, Albuquerque, N.M.
"Thirty years ago, in San Antonio, I bought the 'last' pair of Lucchese Anteater boots for $ 900. They were too small and too torturous to use. I could not enlarge them by any amount of patience. "I would not have bought them if the guy had not told me they were the last pair he would find since the anteater had been placed on the danger list."
-Matt Ahangi, Menlo Park, California.
"Anything and everything black, I think I should be holding calla lilies in a coffin."
-Marsha Holden, Hudson, N.C.
"In the 90s, I bought a G-Star belt. His buckle was a replica of an airplane seat buckle. My friends fell laughing when they saw him. Bad selection."
-James Burns, New York, N.Y.
"Calvin Klein, parachute material, drawstring, three-quarter length cargo pants. I thought they would be light and comfortable to relax weekend activities and provide many pockets to carry the essentials. I ended up carrying so much in the practical pockets, the pants always fell, no matter how tight the cord tied me. "When I went out on the hiking trails, I was a scruffy and lumpy, rather than an elegant navigator of nature."
-Tracy Miceli, Mahwah, N.J.
"A red Valentino dress with feathers, 40 years ago. I felt like a rooster. "
-Marlene Kohn, Adventure, Fla.
"Blaze Orange Fall Ralph Lauren Jacket ... It looked like it was in the moonlight at the Illinois Tollway Authority."
-Carl A. Steen, North Barrington, Ill.
"In the late 1980s, I spent a week's salary in a long, glorious white sweater coat, with monstrous shoulder pads and a fierce hand-painted lion that ran from the top of the shoulder to the hem. and I just could not use it, I gave it to a friend and I regretted it for years. "
-Madeline Hyman, Pacific Palisades, California.
"Once I bought a completely basic shirt with black and white stripes that each person has. I regretted it immediately because I love being different and having my own style. Buying that shirt made me feel like I was as insipid as everyone else. "
-Samantha Harkness, North Scituate, R.I.
"Cowboy boots with a speedo. Drop the microphone"
-Gregory A. Denton, Glendale, Calif.
"A party dress that had a ring underneath. It was so hard to sit or go to the bathroom in it. "
-MaryBeth Wehbe, Bloomfield Hills, Mich.
"I grew up in a city of New England mills in the 60s and 70s. Despite that, I somehow looked like a fashionista without knowing what the hell that meant.As a primary school child, I wanted the bell funds of white banana, far ahead of my time, only the girls' department sold them, but my mother enthusiastically accepted my purchase.These pants were horrible, particularly when combined with a false-Roman green medallion. "
-Steve Hirschfeld, San Francisco, California.
"A pair of red leather pants bought at a store on Rodeo Drive in the 80s. Regrettable with who I was when I bought them: the boss's wife (a conservative religious woman) I felt that she always looked at me suspiciously at events from the office for the next 20 years, it made the joy of an exhilarating rush feel like something I should hide in. I have not worn my pants in years, but I still have them in my closet. "
-Jo-Ellen Smith, Bellevue, Wash.
"A Stephen Burrows evening dress strapless, flaming red and edged with lettuce in the late seventies, I did not regret the dress itself, but the way I bought it, my friend and I hungry of Capitol Hill staff, we were invited to two Christmas receptions of the White House three nights apart, so we shared the cost of the dress, expecting to amortize the expense in the next five years.We were knockouts! But when my friend (second in the rotation) he wiped it dry for a place in Champagne, ignoring the label "Do not dry clean." He returned to us at least two sizes too small, none of us could use it again.
-Candice Shy Hooper, Boca Grande, Fla.
"In my first 20 years, I bought (and wore and wore) a rabbit fur jacket that, with its generous hood and fur pom-poms, made me feel like a retro-glamorous, Sonja Henie. The problem was that he was dying slowly, and every time I slipped, for example, some dark car upholstery, he left a ghostly silhouette in rabbit fur. Finally, I had to give up the coat, at this point called "Thumper", when I started to leave Pigpen-style rabbit furrows wherever I went. Not long after, I became a vegetarian. "
-Phoebe Kosman, Cambridge, Massachusetts.
"Casual pants with a Velcro opening, the first time I went to the men's room, they opened with a heartbreaking noise, I still have them, but just put them in the house."
-George Scheidker, San Agustin, Florida.
"Undoubtedly, he wore a polo shirt inside another polo shirt in the mid-80s at the university, the appearance was to match the color of the logo on the outer shirt with the inner shirt. group of too many collars fighting with too many colors! "
-Gregory Stewart, Carmel, Ind.
"These ridiculous, sequined, leopard-print, and stop-style Converse sneakers, one size larger than the ones I normally wore, when I was a senior in high school. I thought they were "so great" and that I would use them all the time. I used them once for an event and it seemed I had been dazzled by the feet of a clown. I never used them again. "
-Melissa Barba, San Francisco, California.
"Well, I am an Episcopal priest, and, as you know, Episcopalians like the liturgical tradition and all the fine fabrics that are used to build the different 'costumes.' Combo used for fundamental priestly functions. in Rome several years ago, I went to one of the best clothing stores for the clergy to look around, and I discovered a mortarboard! A hat is a rigid four-pointed hat, topped with a large fluffy tassel, which can be wear with a soutane and a surplus! Error! It looked like an eraser!
Father Nick Mezacapa, Rochester, Minnesota
"I bought an evening dress from a second-hand haute couture website. It looked so interesting and elegant, but it turned out to be complicated and confusing with cut-out sides and twisted fabric in the middle. It was like solving a Rubik's Cube and I could never imagine how to use it. It's in the box of "possible Halloween costumes" in my attic. "
-Jennifer Sanfilippo, Rochester, N.Y.
"I bought a very conservative navy blue blazer from Brooks Brothers and took him to the office in khakis and a white collared shirt. Everyone asked me what activities I had planned for the cruise! Yes, I looked like a cruise ship director in 'The boat of love. "
-Linda Salzman, Rancho Palos Verdes, Calif.
"A pair of Frye granny boots almost with laces and laces. I was 8 or 9 years old, 'Small house in the meadow' There was rage and Laura Ingalls Wilder had no better prairie boots. Neither Nellie Oleson. I screamed and screamed to get this last pair, the Holy Grail of the boots, to savor them in the box, smell their leather. But the shoes that I said would fit like a glove were the two left feet. "
-Yael Lieberman, New York, N.Y.
"It's more of an unfortunate fashion decision than a pitiful purchase, but here it goes: in 1978, on the first day of seventh grade at a new school, I realized that wearing a pair of light blue ski pants only made sense. Sunglasses mirrored, a black high collar (tucked under the bib and braces, of course), and a pair of cougars completed the look. I still remember receiving ahave a good day at school"My mother's kiss and the whistling sound of nylon as she walked to the bus, she quickly went downhill from there."
-Jonas Lee, New York, N.Y.
"A fake red fake leather purse from a peddler in Chinatown on my eighth grade school trip to New York. The label was slightly crooked, but I remember that afternoon, when I was walking along the sidewalk with a rope hanging on my shoulder, I thought strangers would confuse me with a model. He had orthotics and probably wore tennis shoes and jeans. "
-Callie Clemons, New York, N.Y.
"I ordered a black tulle tutu skirt
Etsy
.
I was very excited but it looked like a broom too big. I used it twice for Halloween. "
-Sophie Shuklin, Puyallup, Wash.
"It was actually a suit I sewed in high school, I made rust-colored velvet panties with a matching vest and hat, the vest was lined with floral fabric, I must say I was quite proud of my ability to sew. I looked very elegant (this was in the 70s) until I took it to school.I earned the nickname of Captain Smiff and the students even invented a song for my new nickname. "
-Heidi August, Lynnfield, Massachusetts.
"I interviewed for a senior executive position in a management team (men only). They took me to an eastern resort to meet with the entire team and determine if the event was "adequate". The event was characterized as a dinner, but the invitation said something like: "Gentlemen with jackets". piece, $ 2,000 suit from St. John's, professional but suitable for a formal dinner. When I showed up, dinner was a casual clambake-style barbecue on a very cold beach (men wore winter jackets). Needless to say, I was too over dressed.
-Barbara Curry, Chesterfield, Mo.
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